Anonymous asked: I think you are an amazing person. It takes a brave person to put themselves out there like that. You have a real gift for writing.

That means the world to me, love.

antoinemcadams asked: Hey Specks, It Antoine how have you been?

Lol! Lemme guess. Your iPhone autocorrected Alexis to ‘Specks’, huh? I don’t know why it does that but I lowkey like it. It’s my nickname given to my by technology. Lol. I’m fine! How are you?

Anonymous asked: im going through a break up also and i wanted to know how do you keep yurself from calling him on the days that you miss him? i worry i'll never love anyone like i loved my ex

I have those worries too :[ Not only do I fear not having that connection with another person, I also worry that no one will ever adore me as much as he did, (when he did). He showed me that all the things I thought weren’t possible for me, romantically, actually were. That chivalrous men existed. That someone could see me uncut and still love me. And the more men I meet, with their distorted morals and values, the more cynical I become about ever finding a connection with that depth again. But as intense as our love was, so was the bad. So if feeling that passion means I have to also feel all the bad that came along with it, I’m certain I’d rather be alone. And that thought alone keeps me from reaching out.

If that doesn’t work, I just read our old emails because sometimes you just need to see evidence of the mistreatment you endured to remind yourself that it all wasn’t sunshine and rainbow. Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience.

bellaimperfection asked: You're beautiful, your writing is beautiful, and your artwork is beautiful. Oh and you seem to have a beautiful personality. ( Cant leave that out lol ) Just thougtht I share this with you :-). Enjoy your day.

I was totally having a shitty day until this popped up in my inbox. It’s very rare that anyone uses the term ‘beautiful’ in reference to me. Thank you, thank you so much. I can’t stop cheesin’ :D

Anonymous asked: Don't really know how to ask this, but I'm a quiet person especially around people I'm just meeting. It feels like people I come across try to force me to speak or they ask that same old question "How come you don't talk?" When I'm around my friends I'm all laughter etc. Is their a way to deal with people nagging you just to talk.

First and foremost, I want you to understand something that it took me a LONG time to understand - being an introvert is not a flaw. Society tends to shame introverts but I think we’re just misunderstood.  We enjoy being alone, you spend a lot of time in your own thoughts,  like more solitary activities, and prefer fewer and closer sorts of relationships. That’s hardly a flaw. Shyness is different though. It’s not about preference, but is about fear. A shy person could actually be extroverted, they may really want to be the center of attention, yet they can’t because of fear. Shyness is crippling, whereas introversion is welcome and productive.  So first, decide if you’re shy or introverted.

I LOATHE when people nag me about why I’m being so quiet when I’m just chillin’. They repeatedly ask ‘are you not having fun?’ because of it. But it’s inevitable and people will ask. Just tell them ‘I don’t feel like it’ and keep it movin’. Be comfortable enough in your introversion to not care.

Anonymous asked: what do you do on the days you're suffering the most from your breakup? - @Ms_RikkiBoss

I’m sorry you’re having a rough day… believe me; I’m very familiar with those. I try to stay as busy as possible. Hang with your girls, explore your city, get out and party, conquer something you’ve been wanting to (learn the guitar, paint, whatever). Do not listen to love songs, watch romantic movies or anything of that nature. Take yourself out on dates and treat yourself. You deserve it. Plus you set the tone for how anyone else will/can treat you. The loneliest time is at night. I always have a hard time sleeping. Weed helps. But if you’re not into that, get lost in a totally non-love related novel. Not only will it help you escape, but reading helps you sleep. Some days you will sulk, and sometimes that’s what you need to do. I’m a firm believe in ‘it takes half the time you been with someone to get over them’ so sometimes you have to let nature run it’s course and allow time to heal those wounds. If none of this works, hit me up again and we can figure it out together. I still have rough days, myself. Keep you’re chin up.

sarahstitious asked: Do you believe in a higher power & if so, do you believe in the concept of being your own god? Like.. praying to yourself, and thanking yourself, and asking yourself for forgiveness? Putting all that energy into yourself? Weird question I know.

I have a love/hate relationship with religion. I went to mormon, christian, catholic, muslim and every kind of church you can imagine as a kid because my father wanted to expose me to them all and encourage me to make up my own mind about them. They all seemed to have the same basic format so I was all for it. Until I became a teenager. I was ALL about atheism once I hit my angsty years and I’d downright belittle people who were naive enough to believe in God. Annoying, I know. But even though religion was beyond my realm of logic, I still found myself turning to some spiritual entity when I was in need. I don’t know if that entity is within me or if it’s external. Maybe it’s a little of both. Maybe that ‘God’ people think they’re talking to is their own conscious, maybe the good and bad is all determined by what feels right and wrong to us… and that doesn’t make it any less amazing. In fact, that’s even more incredible. I’m an extremely intuitive person so if God is something I should just feel, then these auras, these good and bad entity’s, these positive and negative energy’s - those are the higher power. Because I really FEEL that. When I’m in a potentially harmful situation, I can literally feel the vibe. So maybe it is within us. And I do believe in putting all of that energy into ourselves. Because isn’t that the real life long journey? Learning to love ourselves? Iono. Scattered thoughts.

slckr-life-deactivated20120207 asked: do you ever do a English accent?

I love British slang so yes, sometimes I fake it. For days on end. Lmfao. Focking wankers.

slckr-life-deactivated20120207 asked: do you drink tea every morning?

No but I probably drink tea every day. I love tea.

Anonymous asked: what are your thoughts on kim kardashian?

I don’t think about Kim Kardashian much, honestly. She’s pretty though :shrug: